Day 11 - Telling Stories

I have recently been made aware of a point that I never considered as a point, but I have realised that it stands as a point of contention between me and those around me as it is socially “undesirable” – so to speak, lol. The point is that I seem to repeat stories that I have told many times, but the interesting point is that I am completely unaware of the fact that I am repeating stories. If I look at the point, I realise that the point is based on a desire for attention and that is the point that I will be writing forgiveness on.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be consumed by the desire for attention out of fear of being forgotten
I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realise that the point of me retelling stories that I have already told is a desire for attention
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that without the attention of others I would not fulfil my desire of being important
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need to be important
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being forgotten
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being ignored
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to be noticed and recognised
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being defined as socially unacceptable
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being seen as awkward and weird
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I am socially unacceptable

When and as I see myself starting to tell a story I stop and I commit myself to ask if I have told the story before and not telling it again if the people say yes

When and as I see myself going into the desire for attention I stop, breathe and I realise that the desire is based on fear. I commit myself to bring myself back into my body and stabilise myself without allowing myself to be consumed by fear